DDoP2024-Aug04

comedy4cast #796

Odd News+ for Sunday, August 4

"Limited Options"

Written by

Clinton Alvord

CAST

(in order of appearance, where possible, otherwise by actor)

ID ANNOUNCER.......................COMPUTER
CLINTON............................CLINTON ALVORD

INTRO: COMEDY4CAST STUDIO

MUSIC: COMEDY4CAST NETWORK ID STING

ID ANNOUNCER

The comedy4cast network. Let's dog ear that for now.

MUSIC: ID MUSIC UP AND OUT.

CLINTON

This is comedy4cast, episode 796: Limited Options

MUSIC: OPENING THEME MUSIC IN AND UNDER.

CLINTON

It's time, once again, for the Dog Days of Podcasting, a call for podcasters to try to put out a podcast every day in August. For more information and to hear all the shows, go to dogdaysofpodcasting.com.

Here at the comedy4cast studios we've been working on a new format for this year's dog days. Sure, like in years past, there will be an actual odd news story, but that's not all. So, let's get started with "Odd News+"!

MUSIC: THEME MUSIC UP AND OUT.

SFX: TRANSITION WHOOSH.

STORY 1: HOME REPAIRS

CLINTON

Here are our stories for Sunday, August 4th, 2024.

First up today, another tip from, Lucas, the repair person who comes in to fix things here in the comedy4cast studios.

Lucas says that if your dining table is a little wobbly, a quick trip to your local sporting goods store can solve the problem. He suggests you buy three 50-pound weights and plop them down on one end of the table. To quote Lucas "now that sucker ain't goin' nowhere. You're welcome."

Lucas also points out that if you buy a few 100-pound weights you can probably break the table in half and then "go out and get one that isn't crap."

SFX: TRANSITION WHOOSH.

STORY 2: FOOD

CLINTON

Now lets get to our actual, for-real Odd News story...

Did you ever finish eating a meal and then feel "Oooh. That's not right." That could mean a few things. For instance, maybe you just ate a bowl of wax fruit. But that's not what we're talking about here. Although you should stop doing that.

This is the story of Jenna Gestetner.

As a child, Gestetner had always been labeled as "sensitive." She had sensitive skin, a sensitive stomach and got sick rather easily.

By the time she was 12, things were getting worse. That's when Gestetner realized the symptoms —- such as pain, nausea, fatigue and dizziness —- things people usually only experience when watching Zach Galifinakis movies -- became worse when she was eating certain foods.

So, Gestetner stopped eating the food that made her feel that way. Makes sense. I don't know if she went 100% Galifinakis free.

Anyway, by the time she was 18, her "can eat" list was getting mighty small. That's when she began getting tested for food allergies. A lot of tests for a lot of food allergies.

The good news? After years of suffering, she was finally diagnosed with Mast Cell Activation Syndrome, a condition where the patient experiences repeated episodes of the symptoms of anaphylaxis after eating certain foods.

Okay, maybe that's not great news, but at least now Jenna could work with doctors to come up with a list of foods she could eat. And that's exactly what happened. Jenna Gestetner is now free to eat anything on her approved foods list.

Foods like white fish and turkey; green beans, zucchini, and cucumber; lime, dates, grapes, raspberries, pears, chia seeds, water lily seeds, olive oil and...Well, there's no "and." That's it. 13 foods. Jenna can have 13 kinds of food.

The University of Southern California student tends to eat the same thing every day -- turkey and chia seed pudding for breakfast, protein with vegetables for lunch and dinner, and fruit or water lily seeds for snacks.

But Gestetner decided to put a positive spin on the whole thing. Today, she creates content for social media and shares her experiences with having the condition and loves to help motivate people to see their challenges in a positive light.

So the next time you have one of those days when you feel like there's nothing to eat, even though the refrigerator is full of stuff -- yeah, it happens. But at least now you have some motivation to make the most of what you've got.

Just stay away from the bowl of wax fruit. You know what? Give it to me. I'll send it to Zach.

SFX: TRANSITION WHOOSH.

STORY 3: COMING UP NEXT WEEK

CLINTON

And finally, coming up next week, our Odd News+ consumer affairs reporter, Gabriela Ortiz, investigates the shady world of table umbrellas. Then, local psychic Chris Fenton will be here to amaze us with his annual prediction of what he will be wearing the next time he's here. And so far he's been right 5 out of 7 times. It's all...uh...excuse me...I can't...Somehow my notes got stuck under some 50-pound weights here on the table. But wow! No wobble!

OUTRO: COMEDY4CAST STUDIO

MUSIC: 'END THEME'

CLINTON

That about wraps it up for today's Odd News+. A big thanks to the comedy4cast patrons for helping make this show possible.

Talk to you next time. But for now, that's it. We're done, done, done, done, done. Bye bye!

MUSIC: 'END THEME' UP AND OUT.

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