comedy4cast #783

BIG SHOT

Chapter 15: Chekhov's Gun

Written by

Clinton Alvord

CAST

(in order of appearance, where possible, otherwise by actor)

ID ANNOUNCER..................COMPUTER

CLINTON

DANNY HILLCREST

GILES

CAP

DETECTIVE HAARTTE..........CLINTON ALVORD

NARRATOR......................GARY J. CHAMBERS

STRANGER......................GRANT JOHNSON

MAÎTRE D'.....................NATHAN ALVORD

ABBY FALMACHER

CINDY.........................BONNIE KENDERDINE

INTRO 15-1: COMEDY4CAST STUDIO

MUSIC: COMEDY4CAST NETWORK ID STING

ID ANNOUNCER

The comedy4cast network. Let's dog ear that for now.

MUSIC: CHIRP AS ID BACKGROUND ENDS.

MUSIC: "SHELTER FROM THE STORM" INSTRUMENTAL IN AND UNDER.

CLINTON

This is the 2023 comedy4cast Podcast Spectacular, brought to you by the fantastic Patreon patrons. Thank you!

Why not join Kalynn, Krazy Joe Adventures, Gary, and the other amazing individuals who support the show for as little as a dollar a month.

This year's original 20-chapter story is called "Big Shot". To hear it from the beginning, got to comedy4cast.com/2023. And remember, comedy4cast is all one word, with the number 4. Now, here's Chapter 15: Chekhov's Gun.

MUSIC: "SHELTER FROM THE STORM" UP AND PLAYS TO END.

MUSIC: "BIG SHOT" THEME (SHORT VERSION) IN AND PLAYS TO END.

NARRATOR

Previously in our story, Detective Haartte was the latest Middling Fair resident to share a Danny Hillcrest story with a mysterious stranger. The stranger came to town to find Danny. But, just before the stranger arrived, Danny had rushed out of the hotel after briefly speaking with Giles and Miss Abby Falmacher.

RECAP FLASHBACK BEGINS HERE...

SFX: RECAP FLASHBACK AUDIO SHOULD BE PROCESSED TO INDICATE IT IS NOT AN EVENT OCCURRING IN REAL TIME.

DANNY

(in panic mode)

I had to borrow an awful lot to send out all these scripts. I'm not sure certain people will be happy if things don't work out and I can't repay them.

...RECAP FLASHBACK ENDS HERE.

NARRATOR

Now, after two days of searching, the stranger is returning to the Venus Arms, determined to find Danny, once and for all.

SCENE 15-2: INT. HOTEL LOBBY - DAY

NARRATOR

As our chapter begins, the stranger storms back to the Venus Arms Hotel and Towers, entering through the back door, looking for a place Danny could be hiding.

SFX: GLASS DOOR PULLED OPEN.

SFX: BACKGROUND TRAFFIC NOISE VOLUME INCREASES.

SFX: GLASS DOOR CLOSES.

SFX: BACKGROUND TRAFFIC NOISE VOLUME DECREASES.

SFX: FOOTSTEPS ON MARBLE FLOOR.

NARRATOR (cont'd)

But the pool is padlocked.

SFX: DOOR KNOB RATTLES, INDICATING IT IS LOCKED.

NARRATOR (cont'd)

The doors to the main function hall are fastened.

SFX: ANOTHER LOCKED DOOR.

NARRATOR (cont'd)

And even the on-site pack-and-ship store is sealed shut..

SFX: ANOTHER LOCKED DOOR.

NARRATOR (cont'd)

with just a sign on the door stating "Back next month". Soon enough, the stranger finds himself walking towards the lobby.

SFX: FOOTSTEPS STOP.

STRANGER

(realizing he's back where he already checked)

And I'm back at the restaurant.

MAÎTRE D'

(snootily correcting him)

Le Restaurant mal Allume, monsieur.

SFX: FOOTSTEPS ON MARBLE FLOOR.

STRANGER

(to himself)

How can one person be so hard to find? Mr. Rawlston isn't going to accept this. And neither will I!

GILES

(yelling over to STRANGER)

Excuse me, Mr. Blaine Hendrix! Excuse me!

SFX: FOOTSTEPS STOP.

STRANGER

(a bit of optimism on top of a heap of anger)

I hope you have good news for me.

GILES

Actually, I do. Danny Hillcrest has returned! Uh. Sort of.

STRANGER

What do you mean?

GILES

Well, he did come back. But before I could give him your message, he left again. You just missed him. If you hurry, I think you can catch him.

NARRATOR

The stranger rushes across the lobby and into the revolving door.

SFX: RAPID FOOTSTEPS RACE ACROSS MARBLE FLOOR.

SFX: REVOLVING DOOR STARTS TO TURN, THEN STOPS.

SFX: REPEATED ATTEMPTS TO FORCE THE DOOR TO MOVE.

NARRATOR (cont'd)

But the doors suddenly lock up, trapping him inside.

SFX: NARRATOR'S VOICE PROCESSING REFLECTING HIS BEING INSIDE A SMALL, GLASS-WALLED SPACE.

STRANGER

Oh, great.

NARRATOR

Ha! I knew it would happen sooner or later!

(as an aside)

You know, but, really, you should fix that thing.

(back to narration)

Miss Falmacher comes out of her office and the Maitre d' also rushes to the scene.

STRANGER

(to himself)

What is going on with this...?

(to ABBY and the MAÎTRE D')

Oh. Good. Listen, if you could just push on the door, I need to get out there so I can catch --

ABBY

(interrupting)

Good work, Cap.

CAP

And everyone thought I was crazy.

(pause)

When I said we needed this emergency stop button.

STRANGER

What? Let me out.

SFX: POUNDING ON GLASS DOOR.

ABBY

I don't think so. You'll just keep looking for Danny. And we can't let you find him.

STRANGER

It's my job!

MAÎTRE D'

(indignant)

Monsieur, that idiot may be the Notre Dame of buffoonery, the Arc de Tragedy, but that is no reason to "put out the contract" on him.

STRANGER

Wait a minute. Weren't you ranting to me about how he destroyed your restaurant?

MAÎTRE D'

Oui. And now the entire staff has quit. But that means I am now in charge of the entire eatery. My first act will be to rename it "Le nouveau reste mal éclairé" -- the new poorly lit restaurant!

STRANGER

And you, goth hippie, he promised you Banksy would show up.

CINDY

Like, yeah. And he did. Last night. Total stealth. He, like, stenciled a medieval suit of armor kneeling beside the word "Princess" right there on, like, the back of the bus. Like, way cool. And it's totally staying right there.

STRANGER

This is insane. Miss Falmacher, Danny cost you thousands and he's constantly bothering Giles. And Cap, what about you? Hillcrest kept you awake all that time he was playing the arcade game.

CAP

Yup. Danny annoyed the heck out of me. He still does. But look what I got out of the deal. Miss Falmacher bought me this nice, comfy chair so now I can...catch up on...

CAP begins snoring.

ABBY

Maybe it's a bit too comfy.

SFX: ELECTRIC SLIDING DOOR WHOOSHES OPEN.

HAARTTE

Good, you nabbed him. Nice work, everyone.

SFX: ELECTRIC SLIDING DOOR WHOOSHES CLOSED.

STRANGER

Detective Haartte? Explain this to me. You just got through telling me how Hillcrest got you stuck with that truckload of Venus de Milo junk.

HAARTTE

Turned out to not be a problem at all. Look around.

STRANGER

The stranger looks into the lobby. There are Venus de Milo items scattered throughout the room.

HAARTTE

Miss Falmacher was happy to take everything off my hands. You should pardon the expression.

STRANGER

It doesn't matter. This is ridiculous! I'm getting out of here. And when I do, I'm going to find Danny Hillcrest! I have to!

DANNY

Hi! Danny Hillcrest here!

ABBY

Danny!?

NARRATOR

Abby quickly pulls Danny out of sight of the stranger.

ABBY

When did you get here? Never mind. You need to go. Run!

DANNY

I lovingly enjoy a good marathon, but first, I needingly have to give you this heavy box.

SFX: BOX FALLS TO THE FLOOR WITH A THUD.

ABBY

Copy paper?

DANNY

When I was outputtingly printing my scripts, I used some of the hotel's supply.

ABBY

(suspiciously)

How much?

DANNY

All of it! I knew you wouldn't be happy if you found out. So I bought you more.

ABBY

Danny, if you had the money to buy that, why didn't you do it before you used up all the hotel's paper?

DANNY

I didn't have the money until I sold a bunch of my DVDs in Pleasant View. But I think I left one package of them here.

ABBY

Danny, that's very nice of you. But I'm sorry you had to sell them.

DANNY

OH, don't fretfully worry. I never even opened them. I just read the descriptions on the back.

ABBY

Wait a minute. If this was what you were in debt about, then what is that stranger...

SFX: FIST POUNDING ON GLASS DOOR.

STRANGER

Is somebody going to let me out of here?

HAARTTE

Can do. As soon as the police get here.

STRANGER

Even so, I'm still going to give Danny exactly what he has coming.

DANNY

Oh! Something for me?!

SFX: FOOTSTEPS RUNNING ON MARBLE FLOOR.

NARRATOR

Danny rushes towards the revolving door.

GILES

Danny! Don't!

HAARTTE

Watch out! He's reaching for something in his jacket!

OUTRO 15-3: COMEDY4CAST STUDIO

NARRATOR

Has Danny Hillcrest come to the end of the road? Even though he is inside a building? For answers, be sure to come back for Chapter 16: Paying The Price.

MUSIC: TRANSITION STING.

MUSIC: END CREDITS VERSION OF "BIG SHOT" THEME IN AND UNDER.

CLINTON

Like the show? To help support it, for as little as a dollar a month. go to Patreon.com/comedy4cast -- all one word, with the number 4. As a way of saying thanks, you'll get episode before anyone else, plus behinds the scenes notes and exclusive content. Thank you!

In this episode; as the stranger, Grant Johnson (voicegranted.com); as the maître d', Nathan Alvord; as Abby Falmacher and Cindy, Bonnie Kenderdine; and the Narrator was played by Gary J. Chambers, (garyjchambersvo.com).

Additional voices, as well as story and music by Clinton Alvord. Copyright 2023. All rights reserved.

See you next time. But for now, that's it. We're done, done, done, done, done. Bye bye.